It Was Night

This Passover Supper was to be quite unlike those before. The table was laid with traditional fare; lamb, bitter herbs and unleavened bread. There would be wine. There would be a clear illustration and summarization of Jesus message. He was about to do a “new thing”, marking the end of the Old Covenant and the Institution of the Eucharist, the New Covenant.

The entire meal becomes a sign; a symbol of the Christian Faith. The Eucharist symbolizing the Body and Blood of Jesus under bread and wine. Jesus would give His apostles the power to turn these two elements into the real and true presence of Jesus with the keys to the Kingdom. Thus, when we eat this bread and drink this cup we are spiritually nourished by the true Body and Blood. It is quite a mystery how all of this is accomplished but, this mystery is both the source and summit of the Catholic Faith.

All that is consumed becomes part of our bodies, creating new cells, energy and good health. This Spiritual Food brings this and more. Just as our faith, hope and love brings new life, this bread feeds those virtues and our souls. Let the meal not distract us from Jesus illustration of these virtues in His actions.

After Jesus washed the feet of the disciples, including the feet of Judas, He speaks to them about washing the feet of each other. Serving and supporting one another is love in action. Actions always speak louder than words. All of the group gathered around the table and Jesus, knowing who would betray Him, spoke of the duties of the group; to each other and to the rest of the people of God. He spoke openly about how His Hour had now come. That He would give up His life for the salvation of all. He is the new Paschal Lamb who will be sacrificed; His is the Blood of the New Covenant. It is love, unity and peace.

As Jesus spoke of the betrayal, the room was abuzz with wonder as to who the culprit might be with Peter prompting John to ask Jesus outright who it might be. In a quiet voice, Jesus said to John “It is the one to whom I give this piece of bread when I have dipped it into the dish.” He proceeded to do this and gave the bread to Judas and said to him, “Do quickly what you are going to do.” As soon as he ate the bread, Judas went out. It was night.

Jesus would soon suffer and die on the cross in accordance with God’s will. Judas would also suffer and die by his own hand, without God’s consolation at his final hour. Jesus died under obedience to God’s will. Judas died under the shame and pain of his disobedience. Jesus loved everyone and Judas loved only himself. Jesus had no need for money or the things of this world. Judas loved money more than the people of God. Jesus is the Light of the World. Judas stepped into the night of which the Prince of Darkness calls us to as well.

Our lives are the product of our choices. All that is good seems to thrive in The Light. All are welcome to come in out of the dark and Jesus too, steps out of the dark of His tomb on Easter morning. My prayer is that all have the opportunity to live resurrected lives in the Light of His Face.

Let It Be

We are all so very different. Never assume that someone you are fond of sees things the way you do. This assumption is probably the biggest cause of difficulties in our relationships. It certainly is for me! I misunderstand others and they misunderstand me.

It’s no wonder then, that most of our emotional and Spiritual growth takes place with the context of our relationships, provided we are free of egoism and dualistic ideal, as well as flawed attachments. A flawed attachment is one that supersedes the needs of the other in the relationship. The need for control usually rests with the one who loves the least.

There can be no pure love if there is selfishness, lack of willingness to compromise or values and ethics that oppose those of the other. The “need” for another is often based on a desire to receive something from them as a result of the relationship. This is not pure love. This is more like a business transaction or is based on greed. Greed can be a powerful force and when combined with urgency or lust, is likely the cause of most of the World’s troubles and unrest.

When personal relationships cannot exist in a peaceful manner, how can we expect diplomatic relationships to be any better? When there can be no lasting peace in the hearts of individuals, World peace seems very unlikely. As each of us live out our relationships with fellow citizens, so goes the World. Peace in one’s heart has the power to morph into World peace if we stop trying to force or control others in order to satisfy selfish needs. As we learn to accept our differences and situations, we learn to love.

Review: The Irish Boarding House

I picked up this book on a whim, as I checked out two other books. Historical Fiction suits my taste for “true” stories.

The story is neatly put together as each character’s back story heads up the chapter in which they make their debut. Besides being set in an era of hardship for the Irish, it is peppered with warmth and love as each character brings the best side of their personal baggage to the boarding house. As I turned the pages, anxious to see who the abandoned heroine would take under her wing next, I was never disappointed. There were twists and turns throughout which held my rapt attention.

I’ll be looking for more of Sandy Taylor’s work as I enjoyed both the genre and her style of composition.

Bloom Where You’re Planted

I moved to my current apartment more than thirty years ago and knew at once it was the perfect spot for me. It had two bedrooms, an Easterly facing dining area window and a large balcony.

I lived alone for the first ten years but I thrived on that morning sunshine and the forest view. The spare room was once an office. Then a sewing room and now shelters my adult son who has come home to care for me in my old age.

A few days after I moved in I was rummaging for a notepad, with which to make up a grocery list. I found one in a lower desk drawer and on the cover was a picture of a potted plant with the words, “Bloom Where You’re Planted” printed across the top. The words rang true then and again today, as I’ve never been happier in one place in my entire life.

Shops and services….you name it…are all within walking distance, which is totally convenient as I no longer drive and we can’t afford a car anyway. Besides the bus passes every seven minutes in either direction, just steps from the front of the building. My family doctor even has his clinic right inside the drug store that I do business with.

Being a “military brat” meant never putting down roots. How can anything grow without roots? I didn’t grow very well until I found this apartment and made it my home. Life is good now and I’m very content.

Daily writing prompt
What do you love about where you live?
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What, me worry?

With the demise of Mad Magazine and it’s freckle-faced cover-boy, will his famous saying fall into disfavour? Perhaps his lazzier-faire attitude about worries already has.
Alfred E. Neumann seemed to feel that worrying had little value. There is an adage that says – “Worrying is like a rocking chair; it gives you something to do but, doesn’t get you anywhere.”
For many, worries have become a habit, a distraction from the real issue, which is FEAR. What are we so afraid of these days? We may have inherited certain fears and insecurities from our parents, especially if, like mine, they grew up during the Great Depression. Growing up in an atmosphere of LACK, instills in us a sense that there is “never enough”; enough food, clothing, opportunities or shelter.
Jesus speaks the words, “Be Not Afraid”, three-hundred & sixty-five times in the Bible. That’s once for each day of the year. His most famous illustration of a life free of fear and worry is found in Matthew 6:25-34 (NIV quoted) and verse 30 speaks clearly to the point. “If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, Oh you of little faith?”
The most difficult challenge for many of us is to trust God, and His providence, implicitly. It’s really hard to let go of the idea that we are not in control of our lives. The very idea of letting go runs counter to words like – self-made man, pull yourself up by your won bootstraps; I’m sure we’ve all heard others too.
God’s abundance is truly unlimited and He generously provides that which we need, not necessarily what is merely a want – big difference but, that’s another story. All that is required is that we have faith, relax and listen for the still small voice above the noise of The World. To walk in this faith, is to decide to allow God’s hand to shape our day and use our eyes and ears to see God in all things and to discern what is for us and what is not. This will leave our minds uncluttered from worry and filled with the Peace that He has promised, along with the freedom to live life as He intended.
I speak from my own struggles, as I had turned to friends and associates for advice, counsel and comfort. At times, God chooses to speak to us through friends but most often a well meaning friend may try to help us “fix” ourselves or our problem. If we turn to God, in complete desperation and total abandonment in prayer we may find what we have been searching for; a whisper of encouragement to just put one foot in front of the other and do the very next thing He shows us. At a time when we are weary with worries, He will be with us to provide just what is needed at that moment. This is God’s promise for those who choose to follow Jesus.

Waiting for Spring

beautiful bloom blooming blossom

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Mid-Winter is a time of hibernation and reflection for many, and for us older folks outings can be a real hazard. It makes one feel grateful for friends that will take us to shop for food or will pick up a small item or two for you, as they dash home before the snow becomes deeper. Besides time spent catching-up on social media with those near and far, I felt that this year would be a time of learning for me and I enrolled in a Theology course, done all online, but with a group chat feature for those who may want the “feel” of classroom experience.

Besides gaining new information and broadening my outlook on the subject matter, I discovered something new about teaching methods in general. As a young girl, school was basically information that you memorized and would become useful ay some point down the road. In this class, they seem to be more interested in how and what I see or feel or my impressions at a deeper level of the material presented. Wow! This is a surprise!

What I thought, how I felt and the perceptions I had were always kept tucked away inside. I may have shared them with a friend from time to time but, they were rarely asked for…let alone of interest to anyone but me. Right now, I’m becoming more open with my impression of the subject matter but, not really open about much else. I rarely use the group chat except when the Teacher asks for a response from the class. I don’t join in to the “threads” on the message boards because, frankly, I’m not sure what to say.

Someone once told me, “You talk too much,” and I’m not sure I’ve ever recovered from that. I’ve discovered that what I think or feel is truly of little value to anyone but me, and God. I talk to Him a lot. The tech age has caused most folks to resort to emails and text messages; sort of impersonal. If someone does want to talk, the inflection of the human voice in integral to fully getting the message. Furthermore, many folks don’t bother to respond to an email that may contain general information and perhaps, an invitation to have dialogue.

I went for a ride on my scooter today and what a difference in communication opportunities I had with strangers. So many spoke to me, both in passing, in the grocery store,and in the dollar store. It was delightful! It made me long for those sunny days when folks would gather at the local ice cream shop. It made me even more grateful for the group of Senior’s who gather regularly to share a meal and stories and just “check-in”, as the facilitator calls it. We need to be prodded at times but one story leads to another.

I’m truly looking forward to Spring, not just for a trek around the neighborhood but also for the start of the second course in the series that I was offered. Things may not be as they once were but, “everything will be made new again.” Perhaps, with Divine Intervention, I’ll blossom into a new creature, one that won’t be afraid to speak, one that won’t be afraid to step out and be who God made me to be, which I’m learning is always “enough.”

Clara’s Tears

Aunt Clara was known to weep at the drop of a hat; out of her happiness and out of her sorrow. She was scorned by some but mostly admired for her soft and open heart. I loved the fact that her tears allowed us to truly know her.

These days some are inclined to scoff at the tears of another but many more are drawn to those who are able to freely express their feelings at both the blessings and the burdens of life. Clara was never ashamed of her tears. I wish I could feel the same.

My struggle at self-sufficiency crumbles from time to time and tears will come. I have progressed away from berating myself for my inability to “suck-it-up”, to a place of resignation to the inevitable downpour and allow myself this expression of pain and sometimes gladness. The Psalmist wrote, “God numbers my wanderings; put my tears in your bottle; are they not in your book? When I cry out to You, then my enemies will turn back; this I know, because God is for me.” (Psalm 56:8-9, NKJV) I guess God thinks tears are as important as Aunt Clara did. I’m sure He sees all of our tears and at times, sheds a few of His own at some of our choices.

Like Clara, I am learning that it’s a form of human release of emotion that is too large to contain, and to wonder whether tears need to be held back? When one is observed to be crying, the automatic response of some observors is, “Please, don’t cry. Please don’t be sad.”  Why do they say that? It would be unheard of to deny other emotional expressions. Can you imagine…”Please, don’t laugh. Please don’t be happy.” Denying another the expression of feelings or emotions is tantamount to denying their right to “be.”

Children seldom respond in the same way adults do. Children have fewer inhibitions about who they are and the expression of their needs. Perhaps this is the reason that children are a delight to be with; their openness and lack of self consciousness in many ways. Perhaps that’s why Jesus said, “You must become like a child in order to enter the Kingdom of Heaven.” Is it that the heart of a child is purer than those of us who have knocked around the World for a time?

One day, the answers may all be clear but until then, it’s unlikely that I’ll be public about my teary episodes but I’m going to cut myself some slack and just allow that normal release to take place as needed. It seems to ultimately improve my outlook, not to mention my vision.

Nothing Can be Really Something…

I woke up this morning to nothing. Yet, really something. The usual aches and pains of old age were missing. The Somatic energies, held in my body from past trials, were noticeably absent; I felt refreshed and surprised by this. These annoyances in my body have been present on a daily basis for several years, occasionally rising and falling in intensity but never really absent.

Confused, I sat with my morning coffee, in a state of curiosity pondering this sudden change. Why?, I wondered, had this suddenly occurred. The self-investigator also quickly vanished after a moment or two as I basked in the sunlight pouring in, spreading across the dining table where I sat as I gazed out at the trees in the ravine behind my yard.

An email arrived with interesting news; an obligation for today had been cancelled. There was no need to rush to go out. No one demanding my time or anything else for that matter. What an unexpected blessing!

In the quiet, the clock on the wall ticked on and the question arose about filling the day with alternative “busy work”, which was quickly displaced with an almost imperceptible “Why?” Indeed, why? The kitchen floor needed a scrub, the laundry basket overflowed but, I had already made my bed, washed the breakfast dishes and was dressed for whatever lay ahead for the day and, it was only 8 am.

I wandered to my spare room and tended to the soon-to-be seedlings; adjusted the light and misted the soil. Twenty minutes of reading was a bit of a distraction but, I couldn’t escape the thought that this nothing day could be something. A day of freedom from schedules, manic-compulsions, indulging addictions in order as avoidance tactics and the ultimate bliss of no deadlines. A day to just “be”.

A day to appreciate that which surrounds me; the quiet, the inner peace and the ease and comfort of enjoying a connection to something outside myself…bigger and better. A holy day doesn’t have to be a Sunday in order to be enjoyed as Sabbath. Things unplanned and unexpected can be a delight even if we are part of the “daily grind”, provided they are acknowledged and appreciated.

Today will be a day of thanks to God, for blessings, for Graces and for the realization that each day can be a wonder of it’s own. Nothing can be really Something.

Hospitality; is that YOU?

In a month, my youngest sister is coming to visit. She is traveling from the other side of the country, and while I am excited to spend time with her, there are many things that she and I have never discussed. Here is where my apprehension comes in.

I am deeply religious…a recent convert to Catholicism and she is an avowed atheist. How will my regular prayer life, especially the “public” stuff, like giving thanks before meals, not to mention my routine of Praying the Rosary after dinner be affected? This is all part of “who I am”, in the core of my being and I would like my sister to accept this aspect of me that she has never seen, let alone been near anyone who lives in this manner.

I have decided not to “hide” who I have discovered I am. Most of my life was spent in hiding and in some degree of shame about myself. My thought life, my beliefs about the World around me, my wounds, were all kept under wraps. I once attempted to open-up about the “inner me” to my beloved Nana, who was probably the only person in the world that I trusted but she silenced me by advising that, “we don’t talk about such things”. So, I began to stuff all that I thought and felt deep inside and I ceased trying to “be heard”; I became a bit of a mouse, scurrying here and there, doing for others, all in an attempt at some sort of recognition.

Shortly before becoming a Catholic, I decided that, although I might be considered different from others, I was NOT bad or wrong or defective. Yes, I had much to learn about myself but taking that first big step and accepting God’s forgiveness for any mistakes I had made in my life, knowing deep in my heart that He loved me unconditionally enabled me to freely “be” who He had made me to be. I am praying today, and in the weeks preceding my sister’s arrival, that God will grant me the grace to live out what He has made me and called me to be. As my only remaining sibling out of the five, it would be nice if she loved and accepted me exactly as I am but, my ultimate happiness and joy is no longer contingent upon the approval or acceptance of others.

This is the true freedom Christ has promised. Peace and freedom were the reasons that I began to follow Jesus in the first place. I don’t plan to relinquish these gifts but visits and social contacts can be awkward with those who are opposed to your views. I can only hope to be a quiet witness to my sister of all the blessings I have received through faith.